Mother’s Day always disappointed my mom. Although we kids enthusiastically presented her with carefully created cards, the celebration fell short of an unattainable ideal of what motherhood should be. Her deep emotions inevitably led to a letdown no matter how hard we tried to fête her.

This early countercultural acknowledgement of mixed sentiments informs my feelings about Mother’s Day even though I have learned to enjoy the holiday. This morning my hilarious husband presented me with a “Best Wife in the World” plaque, which I happily placed next to the “Trophy Husband” plaque my kids presented to him a couple of years ago. The planned restaurant dinner with my sons tonight constitutes a sacred observance where they will roast me mercilessly. Yet, as I woke up this morning, my mother’s acknowledgment of imperfection was my first thought.

I spent many brokenhearted Mother’s Days honoring the moms in my family, not knowing whether I would become a parent. It was not until I adopted my two extraordinary sons that I truly understood my mother’s profound emotions facing the challenges and joys of motherhood.

As countercultural as mom’s mixed sentiments is my work creating families alternatively through adoption, assisted reproduction and surrogacy. My clients must let go of the typical path to becoming parents and work with focused determination to have children. Today I am laughing at my “Best Wife in the World” Mother’s Day gift with irreverent awe at the magnificence and imperfection of motherhood, however achieved.